This post is my account of the first five days of the Vipassana course leading to that incredible, indescribable, powerful albeit brief moments of that intense Kundalini rising.
About Kundalini
Before trying to understand what Kundalini energy is, it is important to also understand the concept of Chakras.
A chakra is a wheel of spinning energy connecting body, mind and Spirit
Read more about Chakras here.
And a good read about Kundalini here.
I don’t quite remember when I had my Kundalini awakening. Although the first significant experience happened during our passive Kundalini meditation on the Manipura (third chakra). Or probably earlier than that during Reiki Level 2 attunement roughly more than a year ago.
I will detail the experience I had during the course at the end of this post.
Day 1-3: learning the Anapana meditation
Anapana, or respiration awareness, was the first meditation technique taught in the course. Focusing on the breath is nothing new to me, however, the part where you are to focus on the sensations that occur during respiration was the difficult part.
I am generally “blind” in my body. During our Reiki attunement, I could not feel anything. The most recent times I started feeling heat sensations in my hands, like spinning balls of heat, were during my savasana in my home practice a few months before the retreat.
On the first one and a half days, the focus is the triangular area on the left image. And on the next one and a half days, reducing the area of focus as in the image on the right.
This technique trains the mind to remain focused on one point. The breath is used as an object of focus, a real object of the present moment. And when the mind is focused with equanimity, without craving or aversion, samadhi or mastery over ones mind is developed.
I don’t have a lot of experience with meditation techniques but this is the first technique that focuses on something concrete, tangible. Other techniques use visualization or verbalization to concentrate the mind.
It is also important to note that while the mind is focused on the triangular area around the nose, any other sensations in the body must be ignored.
On the first few hours of meditation, my mind wandered endlessly. Although I could pull it back to focus on my breath within half a minute, it took me a while to really keep my focus steady on my breath. I have a hyperactive mind, and long sittings of meditation is a real test of whether I can master the deeper unconscious mind.
After 32 hours of meditation (end of Day 3), I managed to feel the sensations on the outer ring of my nose. I managed to keep my mind still and calm.
Okay, maybe reduce that number by 10. I have to say, on the first long meditation sitting of Day 1, right after the instructions were given, we were given the option to either stay in the meditation hall or continue meditation in our residential quarters. Most of the students left, as did I. And most especially on the first day of waking up at 4am, the sight of the bed only meant one thing. ^_^
AdhiTThAna sittings
After the evening discourse of Day 3, the difficulty level of the meditation sittings was taken to a whole new level. The remaining 45 minutes of meditation for the day was the first Adhittana sitting, or Meditation of Strong Determination.
This is the real deal!
The first three days, a lot of us have been fidgeting, shuffling, taking toilet breaks, or skipping some hours of meditation to sleep. No big deal. There was no pressure.
Adhittana sittings changed the game. Meditation of Strong Determination. Strong determination not to move. Not to open or change legs, not to open the eyes, not to move the hands. Nothing. Just being there, sitting still for a full one hour of meditation. Mind fixed.
So when Goenka gave the instructions for the Adhittana sitting, I reacted with an amused smile.
This means I just have to deal with the pain in my legs – leg numbness (and the pins and needles!), the knee pain after loooong sittings, sitting bones pain, ahhhh the beads of sweat trickling down, hair on my face, that occasional hair inside the nose, and THAT itch! You just got to scratch that itch!
Day 4: Learning the Vipassana Meditation
Finally, the day came for us to learn Vipassana meditation.
Learning Anapana meditation the first three days is really just a preparation for the Vipassana technique. In Vipassana, the attention is moved throughout the body. Starting from the top of the head, to the tips of the toes. And back again.
Later on, we learned to scan from head to toe and back up to the head. Even later, we learned to scan the body symmetrically, synchronously. And even later in the practice, free flow. (Note that free flow doesn’t happen to everybody in the duration of the course.).
Everything together: mastery of the mind, observation of sensations, maintaining equanimity, strong determination. Vipassana.
I will talk more about my struggle with equanimity in another post. ^_^
So, My kundalini Rose During Vipassana
On day 5, while I was scanning back up from the feet to the head, as I passed my attention from my lower back, I had this intense shot of heat running along my spine from the base all the way to my head.
I’ve had episodes of this sensation a couple of times during the meditation but this particular experience was was so intense I sat bolt upright.
As the burst of energy reached my head, I had this sudden wave of calm. Nothing seemed to matter at that particular moment. Nothing felt right. Nothing felt wrong. It was just pure awareness of the present moment. Pure light through my otherwise shut eyes.
No visions, no sounds, no sensations.
Just Quiet. Stillness. Bliss.
I found that connection. But only for a brief moment.
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